


Importance

by cheriiato



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Insecure Lance (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Lance (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-07-28
Packaged: 2020-07-24 19:28:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20019802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheriiato/pseuds/cheriiato
Summary: Remember that one scene where Keith tries to sacrifice himself? Yeah no one talks about that enough.Aka: Lance and Keith stop sacrificing yourselves and realise that you're gay for each other. Please.





	Importance

"Keith! What the hell did you think you were doing?!" Lance shouted as he burst into Keith's room.

"I--- What? I'm drawing," Keith replied, startled. He knew what Lance was actually referring to, but there's no one he'd be less willing to talk to about his previous actions. He looked down and twiddled his thumbs, not quite able to meet the other boy's icy blue stare.

"That's not what I mean and you know it. Why the quiznak would you do that?" Lance yelled, once again. Keith flinched, he wasn't getting out of here without an explanation. But what was there to explain? He only did what he had to. The Blade would have been proud of him. So then, why was Lance-- and the rest of his team, for that matter-- so upset with him?

"Lance, no I just--" He mumbled, running his hand through his long black hair, trying to figure out a decent way to explain.

"Don't "Lance, no I just--" me! Why the hell did you do that, I deserve an explanation! We all do, Keith!" Lance's voice broke mid-sentence, and Keith felt a pinch of remorse. Seeing him upset was never something he was able to deal with. He should be happy. "Why in hell would you think." Lance took a breath. "Why would you ever think sacrificing yourself was a good idea?!"

Keith had tried to hide from the question altogether by running straight to his room after the mission. He should have known it wouldn't work, but if anyone had to come in to talk, why not Shiro? Shiro might actually listen and understand.

He thought over his answer carefully, coming up with about a hundred different excuses before waving them off.

"I just thought you'd be better off that way," he mumbled, unable to say anything else. He knew he'd sound stupid and selfish, but what else could he say? 

He expected Lance to maybe lay off a bit, to have some sympathy. He wasn't prepared for the outburst of anger that actually came from his statement.

"How?! How would that make us better off in any way? Yeah, because Voltron would be so much better without the red lion!" Lance sneered sarcastically, his once calm and caring eyes now filled with fury and quite possibly hatred. "Voltron would be so much better off without it's red paladin, definitely! There wouldn't even be a Voltron anymore if you'd succeeded!"

"I never said Voltron would be better off. You all would," Keith said, not knowing how else to explain himself. Where had he been going with this?

"How?! You don't even know that it would've worked! And if it hadn't? Zarkon would just enslave the entire universe! How would that be any better Keith? And why would you sacrifice yourself, do you have any clue how important you are to this cause? You can't just go around doing that," Lance looked down, and his blue eyes seemed to be filled with emotion.

He studied him and, eventually, his mouth began moving without ever consulting his brain first.

"Tell me you wouldn't do the same, Lance." Keith mumbled, hardly audible to even himself.

"What?"

"Tell me, that if you had a chance to stop Zarkon here and now, at the cost of your life, that you wouldn't." He said, raising his voice before practically shouting. No doubt the other paladins would start to worry soon, but he couldn't even think of that. Keith looked about ready to take back his words when Lance finally spoke up.

"I mean, maybe I would, bu--" 

"See?" Keith said. He pushed Lance, though a bit more aggressively than he had initially intended. He didn't expect an answer from him, let alone that one. 

"That doesn't mean you can!" Lance shouted, his voice once again breaking. 

Keith looked over at the boy, his 'rival', if you could even call him that. It was more like Lance hated him and he just went along with it. He knew he could be rude but he couldn't help but be enraged by his words. He looked as if he were taunting him all of a sudden. 

Keith knew if he said something wrong, it was very likely he'd start an all-out war between supposed peacekeepers.

He didn't care about that now though.

"Oh what, so it's okay for you to do it but not me? Lance can be the hero but 'Oh, not Keith, never Keith! Because he's just some emo little shit who doesn't deserve any recognition!' Isn't that right Lance?" The words shot from his mouth, like bullets ricocheting through a thin pane of glass. He studied Lance and looked at his face, spotted with freckles, adorned with features that Keith would love at any other given time, and swung.

As his fist connected to Lance's arm, which had been brought up to block his face, he watched Lance fall to the ground, not bothering to fight back, barely catching himself as he fell. A wave of remorse crashed into him, though he buried it under the mess of their current situation. Lance just sat on the ground for some moments after, hand moving up to where he had been hit. Keith expected retaliation, a punch after he got up, something, anything. But he just sat, curled up in a ball, not once looking up, as if he had forgotten how to stand. And then, he heard crying.

"Lance-"

"Keith, no! Shut up, shut the hell up!" Lance slapped at Keith's arms with one hand, the other cradling his own face. Lance didn't want to actually hurt him, he wouldn't be able to forgive himself, even if Keith had already done so to him. But he had to make him understand. He continued yelling at Keith, though most of his words were indecipherable. "Don't say that, don't, I don't think that, please, Keith, you're important, please don't,"

He let out choked sobs and trailed off, continuing to spit out indecipherable sentences as he breathed rapidly and tried to calm himself. Lance, who had always held his head up high, was now hidden behind himself, attempting to escape reality staying trapped in his own mind.

"Yeah, I'm a paladin," Keith said, trying to keep his composure around the sobbing boy on the ground. "We all are, Lance, we all have our place on the team," he said, blowing off the statement. He knew that's all he was to Lance in particular, no matter how much he may have wanted to change that fact.

The boys stayed quiet for a while, and Keith had assumed they were done with this conversation. Fine by him, he was sure Lance wasn't very comfortable continuing. As he turned to him, about to ask him to please leave his room so he could be alone-- which he would inevitably spend going over his actions and hating himself for every word-- he heard Lance mutter something that he can't help feeling wasn't meant for him to hear.

"Except me, right?" Lance queried, eyes shining with tears. The phrase was short, a mere three words, but it sent shivers through Keith's spine. He couldn't have heard that right. He begged for his hearing to have deceived him, he prayed for it to be an illusion, a horrible fantasy.

"What?"

"Everyone except me is important here." Lance stated. He sat, trying desperately to stop the tears that were threatening to fall once again. "Everyone else has a place, something that they're actually good at." He moved his curly hair behind his ear and let out a sigh.

"Lance. You're the blue paladin. Your lion chose you for a reason," Keith mumbled, not sure what else he could say. He walked over to the other, who had his head down. He seemed to only be angered at Keith's presence next to him, but he didn't move.

"My lion probably didn't even want to choose me, Keith!" he growled, hitting at Keith's arm that reached out to him. "I'm all there was! I'm the only one who happened to not be suited for any other lion so Blue got stuck with me! I'm not cut out for this Keith, you know that!" Lance let out more sobs, trying to cover up the noise. Why was he doing this? 

"I shouldn't even be here," Lance mumbled, his voice small and defeated. "Just.. Nevermind Keith. I'll leave you alone now." He stood to leave, off to his own room. His mind needed to be cleared. He couldn't stay here with Keith.

"Lance... Don't say that. You're an important part of this team," Keith said, pulling him back. He held Lance close to him, an arm wrapped around his shoulders. He didn't give a shit anymore, maybe Lance wanted to leave but he wasn't letting that happen until he helped him talk it out. He would be devastated, knowing Lance was hurt and he didn't at least try to help.

"Am I really though? Like, couldn't we just find a new blue paladin? I mean, that's really all I have to offer and if Allura or someone did it you guys wouldn't have to worry about the annoying seventh wheel anymore, you know?" He scooted away from Keith slightly and pushed his arm off, not wanting to be around him much longer. He didn't want Keith to hurt him again after what he suggested. "I'm sure Allura could do it. She'd be better at it anyways. Seeing as her dad was an original paladin, she must know what she's doing. And it's no secret that she wants to pilot a lion"

"Lance, what are you---" Keith started, only to be cut off with his answer, albeit not the one he wanted.

"Why don't you just find a new blue paladin Keith? Why'd you guys have to settle with just me? Just little old Lance. Lance who's so pathetic that even after trying his damn best he can't even save anyone. Not even himself," he strained, coughing and crying. He was going to regret this conversation later, wasn't he? Why did Keith have to care? But then, wasn't that what Lance had wanted this whole time? For someone to care? He dropped his head down to his knees and squeezed his eyes shut. Block it out.

"Lance. Look at me," Keith mumbled, Lance didn't move. He sat there, desperately trying to ignore him. Ignore his feelings. Ignore it all. "I said look at me." He grabbed Lance's face, jerking it so he could look in his eyes. He needed to understand how much he meant. "You are not just someone we settled for. You have your place on this team."

"Yeah, that's rich, especially from you." Lance laughed bitterly. He pushed Keith away again, this wasn't how it was supposed to be. Their faces were too close, they were being too serious, but he couldn't stop. He was opening up like he much needed, but in doing so he was spilling everything. To Keith. Keith fucking Kogane, his self-proclaimed rival. Keith Akira Kogane, who couldn't stand him.

"Am I just that bitch who everyone tolerates? The one who's just an annoying flirt, or a goof? The one who doesn't even fucking matter, but we just bring him along, just because? Like, "Oh yeah sorry he just kinda floats around us, don't mind him.'" He wasn't thinking at this point, his feelings were all over the place and spilling quickly. Did he even really think that? He had to stop this. But he didn't want to. He wanted to keep confiding in Keith, he wanted it more than anything, he needed this. To let go, to feel.

"No," Keith mumbled, and it was broken. It was hurt, and shattered, and powerful. And Lance felt his walls being torn down. He laughed, in spite of it all, before responding.

"So then what am I, Keith? What am I to you, or to anyone else out here, other than just some pathetic fill-in or waste of space?"

There was silence, for some moments. Loud, heavy silence, and it filled the room and halls and castle rapidly, and the boys sat, tension and emotions piling higher than either could handle.

He had to leave, had to get out, escape, run, forget this conversation, of course Keith didn't care, of course he couldn't answer, but the answer was filling the space, the answer was nothing, and the nothingness was taking over his head, his body, his thoughts, everything.

And then Keith spoke.

"You're our sharpshooter, Lance," he started, and Lance laughed bitterly, remembering when he had referred to himself as such. Where had that confidence gone, or was it ever really there? Keith wondered as well, he could ask, but he doubts Lance would answer him. He had hidden what he felt for so long now, it seemed both of them had. Not anymore.

"You're the team's morale. You're the boy who loves his family and friends, and who's willing to give his all in anything and everything he loves." Keith put his hand on Lance's shoulder. He needed to be there. "You're the one who's always striving for improvement, so much so that it becomes a problem in some cases. You're the boy who always argues with me over silly, unimportant things because this little rivalry keeps us both grounded."

"Keith---"

"I'm not done yet. You're the boy who never settles for anything less than the best, and even then isn't satisfied. You were assigned cargo pilot and thought "Hell no," because you knew you could do better. And when you got your chance, you gave it your absolute best effort. And now you're a paladin of Voltron. A defender of the universe. Most importantly, you're Lance McClain, our friend." Keith gave his shoulder a squeeze for emphasis. That was good right? That… that should help, right? Oh God, did he mess up? Did he make it worse? Oh, oh no… Did his feelings slip up? Fuck.

"Keith... Do you really believe that?" Lance's tears fall down his face, voice small and almost afraid of the answer. How could Keith see all that in him?

Keith took a deep breath. No going back.

"Of course I do. Do you?"

"I don't, I don't know! I can't, because I still feel like an emotional wreck! And like, after years of being a paladin of Voltron, after fighting for so long I'm just so ready to give up, you know? And I'm so sick of losing people that I'm close to, so sometimes it feels like, why don't I just lose myself in space instead? Because how the fuck can I keep on fighting a fucking war when all I want is to go home?" Lance's voice fades as he rambles on, beginning to cry again but unable to stop himself.

"I want… I want to see my niece and nephew, and my sister Veronica, and Marco, and Luis, and my parents and my grandparents! I don't even know if they're alive! And I just want to be happy with you and my friends and…" He took a shaky breath, not even thinking about his words anymore. "Fuck. Keith. How am I supposed to keep fighting when I just want peace?"

Keith grabs onto Lance's hand, squeezing it tightly, and letting out a soft chuckle. "Are you done?"

Lance looked at him in disbelief, but nodded. He just poured his heart out to him! Is that really all that he had to say? Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Don't come to Keith for support you idiot. Here it comes, Keith is going to make him leave, or make fun of him for saying all that, or finally put the pieces together and tease him relentlessly or just straight up hate him and-

Keith just shook his head with a small smile. "And everyone says I'm the impulsive one."

"I mean," Lance starts, his voice wavering, "You kinda punched me in the face earlier, so I wouldn't say that's completely false. Rude, by the way. I'm still waiting for an apology."

It's supposed to be a joke, but it makes Keith's heart hurt and he winces.

"I mean uh, it's fine though," Lance says as he forces a laugh. "I kinda deserved it. Knock some sense into me, I kinda wouldn't shut up, I do that. Besides, it's not like I haven't had worse from the galra, we're fighting a war after all. So really uh, yeah you don't actually have to apologize."

His words don't reach Keith though, and he doesn't feel any better. He lets out a string of apologies, mixed with him cursing himself. "Don't say that, you didn't deserve it." He grabs Lance's face, another pang going through his heart as Lance flinches. He cradles his face in his hands, inspecting where he had hit him.

"In sorry Lance, I'm so sorry, fuck, I can't believe I did this, I'm such an idiot."

"I mean, yeah, kind of." Keith stayed silent. "But I told you, it's fine. I'm fine. You didn't wanna talk about it and I was just kinda being a bitch to you even though you didn't even like me to begin with so it's understandable."

Keith blinks in surprise. "Rewind."

"You didn't want to talk about it?"

"No." Keith shames his head, furrowing his eyebrows. "The other thing. You said that I..."

"That you don't like me? Keith what're you getting at? What, do you just want me to say it an extra ten times til I get it through my thick skull, or--"

"Why would you ever think that I didn't like you?"

"Well, a guy can kinda assume, Keith. Despite the team's beliefs, I'm not that stupid. I mean you completely forgot I existed at first and on top of that, that you just sorta ignore me and blow me off every chance you get, so it's not really hard to tell." Lance played with his hands as he talked, trying to figure out how to word what he was saying.

"Lance I--"

"Oh don't go trying to be the nice guy now, Keith, you're not exactly good at that. Look, I like you, you don't like me, that's chill, I'm not gonna cry. Think I've done enough of that already today," he finishes with a bitter laugh that hurts Keith's heart. But…

"You like me?"

"Big whoop. Want me to say it again so you can make fun of me properly," Lance sneers. He cocks his head and raises an eyebrow.

"You like me."

"Yeah, okay, I like you. Need me to inflate your ego anymore, or can I go hide in my room now? It's not everyday I try to confess to someone I swore I wouldn't fall for." Lance sighs and hides his face in his hands, screwing his eyes shut.

"You like me. I like you too," Keith whispers under his breath, a shocked smile forming on his face. He starts laughing giddily.

Lance's eyes fly open at the confession. "Wait, you, you what?!" Lance's voice cracks and he covers his face in shame for a small moment, before remembering his situation.

"I--"

"No, shut your quiznak--"

"You still aren't using that correctly."

"--you actually like me?! Like, romantically and shit? I thought, I thought you hated me! We were rivals, you know, Lance and Keith! Neck and neck!" Lance flails his arms as he speaks, and Keith chuckles amusedly.

"First off, you're literally the only one who thought we were rivals. Also, I practically confessed my love to you earlier when you were having a pity party." Keith rolls his eyes.

"Oh, wait you--! Oh my GOD," Lance groaned, running his hand over his face. "I really am an idiot, and then, and then! I shot you down! I even, Dios Mio, I'm sorry Keith! You probably thought I was the biggest asshole ever!" He rushed to give Keith a hug, only loosening his grip slightly when he flinched. 

"Lance." Keith's voice was firm and confident now.

Keith ran his hands through Lance's hair, and he sighed.

"You're not an idiot, Lance."

"But I, Keith! You confessed to me in a cheesy, over-the-top romantic way, and I accidentally rejected you!"

"If it makes you feel better, that isn't the first time you've done that."

"How in the whole ass universe would that make me feel better, Keith! How many times have I done that to you and not even explained myself!"

"A lot," Keith mumbled, but he laughed at Lance's dramatics. "But, if you want to make it up to me, we can go out later?"

"Go out… we're in space, Keith, how do you reckon we go outsi-- Oh! On a date! Oh! Yes!" Lance flushed.

"You really are bad at this whole romance thing, huh?" Keith mused.

"Well I've never been on a date, let alone anyone actually like me, so I apologise for that, Mr. High and Mighty."

Keith sat perplexed. "You've never been on a date? But you act so…"

"Slutty?" Lance said, not missing a beat, but hurt shone in his eyes.

"Confident."

"Oh, that. Yeah, well, it's easier to be confident when all that's on the line is another pretty face." Lance shrugged his shoulders and looked at his feet. "Add in genuine feelings and that's where it ends for me."

"Well, Lance, I'm glad I could be your first…"

"Boyfriend? Are we boyfriends?" Lance wondered allowed.

"Mmm," Keith mused, a teasing smile tugging at his lips. "I think I have to take you on a couple dates before we can be boyfriends."

"Oh? What's stopping you then?"

"Lance?"

"Yeah, Keith?" Lance smiled.

"Would you like to go… to go on a date with me?" And even though they'd already established that he most definitely would like that, Keith still gets extremely flustered.

Lance couldn't help the bubble of affection that rose in his chest. He leaned in, pecked Keith's cheek, and smiled brightly.

"I would love to."

**Author's Note:**

> This one is rushed and the plot said *poof*. Also ty guys for actually reading Cookies and Confessions,that was unexpected. <3


End file.
